Well, needless to say, as much as I hate to miss it, I think I will respectfully decline their invitation. I do however, think that a lecture in "watchfulness" might seriously benefit the congregants who distributed the flyers.
Merry Meet Again, Family, Friends and Lurkers!
Yesterday, I awoke with every intention of going to work and I would have gone too, if it wasn't for the damn meterologist on 1010 WINS!
From the moment I opened my eyes, he repeatedly taunted me with predictions of a glorious day filled with sunshine and warm temperatures. As hard as I tried to prepare myself for a day at the office, I just couldn't bring myself to do it.
Sometime around 9 a.m., I heard the doorbell ring. "Strange", I thought. I wasn't expecting anyone and no one knew that I'd be home today..not even me. I looked out the window and there were no familar cars in the driveway. I decided to err on the side of caution and not answer the door.
Later, when I went out to retrieve the mail, I found a flyer stuck in the door. On the front, in big, bold letters it said, "How Can You Survive The End Of the World? And then, "You are warmly invited to come and listen to the answer".
The World is ending??? Holy Crap!! Why didn't I get the memo!
I realized that this cheerful message had been brought to me courtesy of the local congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses. I wondered why they got the news that the World was ending before anyone else did. I was certain that the Buddhists would have gotten it first. And, didn't they realize that "warmly invited" and "End of The World" doesn't belong in the same context?
I also wondered, what makes them so sure that I want to survive the end of the World? Who else was going to be there? Did they have a list? Were the Pagans invited, or did we need to convert first? These things are definitely going to effect my decision. More importantly, if the World ends....where are they going to put all the survivors?
The flyer was actually an invitation to a program on "mindful watchfulness" or "Keeping On The Watch" for signs that the end was near.
The program included:
*Staying Awake as Christian Families (I knew there had to be a catch! I'd have to convert first)
* Know That the End Is Near
* Imitate Jesus' Example of Watchfulness
* Keep in Expectation, Watching for Jehovah's Day.
Because unless they just happened to miss the huge pentacle on the front door and the plaque that reads, "Best Witches", chances are they won't be amongst the survivors.
In Darkness, Light!